I’m Sorry You Were Sad Today
Exactly five years ago, we were in Ukraine, just two weeks into our five-week adventure for Masha’s adoption. For the next few weeks, I’m posting excerpts and a photo or two from each day. Sometimes funny, and sometimes proof of how naive we were, I hope you’ll enjoy our little trip down memory lane…
[Today, we] did a little bit of English as we were finishing up lunch. We worked on some basic emotion words like “happy,” “sad,” “confused,” and “frustrated.” We moved over to the park just a couple of blocks away, and continued with a little bit more English. Masha was pretty pouty and resistant, but went along with it while the other kids were there….We are learning that English (and studying in general, probably) is going to be one our biggest challenges with her. She commented later that she wasn’t good in school and that she thought she couldn’t learn it. She seems to be very much like me…if she doesn’t get something quickly, she gets frustrated and angry at it, but if she does get it quickly, she rocks through it and is bored. Finding a balance of challenging her, but setting her up for success will be, um, an opportunity for us and her teachers….(insert seasoned parental advice here, please???)
2012 Note: It’s fascinating to look back on this and see where we were right and where we were wrong. After five years…Yes, Masha gets very frustrated when something is hard, but instead of giving up, she is tenacious. Her effort and commitment to doing well at school continues to surprise us!
We had arranged to spend some time with just the three of us at the park, and we got back there about the time that Lisa and Fred and their girls were leaving. When Masha learned that her friends were leaving and that Sveta wouldn’t be staying with us either, she toppled over the edge. She sat on the park bench in her new shoes and stared straight ahead with tears streaming down her face. This is sooo hard for her. She is used to having other kids around 24/7, and she is totally out of her comfort zone, as are we.
We all returned to the orphanage a little early so we could play with all the kids and the girls grabbed the cameras and took kitten pictures. As we left, Mark said to Masha “I am sorry you were sad today,” and she replied “It’s OK” and gave him a big hug. I guess she’s just 12!
How do you handle disappointment and frustration? Leave a comment…
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About Christine
I am a writer, a project manager, and a corporate refugee with a heart for orphans around the world. My two daughters were adopted from Ukraine at ages 12 and 14. I post about writing, chasing dreams, and making a difference in the world, and sometimes I share fun snippets of fiction in-progress.
I pretend I don’t care about whatever disappoints and frustrates me. Or I carp about it incessantly . . . mostly to my virtual cubemate at work . . . aka my work wife.
Eventually I work toward acceptance vs. denial and i don’t care-dom . . .
And I’m so proud of you for reaching the magical point of apathy! Love you, Wifey! 😛
And a quick followup…I showed this to Masha on Friday evening. The second she saw the picture, she commented “Oh, I was SOOOO pissed that day!!” Did I mention her amazing memory??