Goodbye, my love

Last week, I broke up with Resistance.

It was a very public breakup. It should have been on the cover of Us magazine.

In an effort to gain sympathy and support, and probably to shame Resistance a little more than is really mature, I posted a break-up letter (in the comments) at The Write Practice.

Resistance didn’t take the breakup like a man.

He knows that throwing things wouldn’t really get him very far. Instead, he played on my sympathy. He called me asking very detailed questions about how to separate lights from darks when he does laundry.  Whether that new red shirt could go in with the white load.

I told him yes, yes it could.

I’m sometimes not very nice.

“What?” you ask. “I thought you were married to Mark?  Who is this ‘Resistance’ guy?”

Thank you for asking…

Resistance has been courting me for years.

He throws parties for me.  He makes movies like Transformers and Iron Man 3.  Resistance loves to watch House Hunters International.

He wins me over, catches me in his web of distraction and selfishness.  He tricks me into trusting him with a key.

Once trusted, Resistance sneaks further into the cracks of my life.  He hides in the security of working long hours for extra cash or promotions.  He lurks in the kids’ social schedules and extracurricular activities.

He creeps around my house, stows away in my car, follows me through security at the airport.

Resistance bullies me.  He wraps me in a cloak of insecurity.  He tells me I can’t, or I shouldn’t, or that I suck.

Resistance stands between me and God.  Between me and God’s plans for me.

The worst thing of all?

Resistance is a player. I am not his only love.

Resistance is the force that stops every one us from chasing our dreams, from creating art through words or brushes or guitars, from creating beauty through teaching or learning or leading.

You don’t have to be a “creative” to be vulnerable to his charms.  You just have to have a goal.

• Want to lose ten pounds?  Resistance will bake you a birthday Piecaken.
• Want to run a marathon?  Resistance will trip you and twist your ankle.
• Want to get out of debt?  Resistance will break the timing belt on your car.

Life is easy when Resistance is in charge, when he’s calling the shots.  It’s comfortable.  But there’s more to life than comfort.

• There’s love.
• There’s joy.
• There’s serving and expecting nothing in return.

Resistance isn’t so much a fan of those things.  And when you start to find a dream, when you start to step out of your comfort zone…that’s when Resistance notices you like a tall blonde at Comic-Con.

He will charm you.

He will entertain you.

He will ply you with amazing food and wine and chocolates.

Don’t believe him.

I’ll tell you the same thing I tell my daughters:  ”That boy is only after one thing.”

It’s time to break up.

What does Resistance woo you with?  Leave a comment….

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